Autism Mom Shares Tips for a Healthy Marriage

tips for maintaining marriage with autism

There’s no doubt that extra stress on a relationship can cause some issues. However, Julie Green has plenty of advice to share on how to keep your marriage strong while having a child with special needs. She’s been married for 15 years and is a mother for 10. Although Green claims to be no expert, these methods have been successful for her.

  1. Work as a team.

This actually applies to parenting in general but crucial for those with an autistic child. Things tend to to fall apart when you start to work against each other. Instead, work with each other. Remember you are all on the same team, which also includes the child. So no one should feel like the enemy. The main goal is try and achieve a better understanding of your child.

  1. Designate an Autism-Free Time.

This may be odd to hear, and even more difficult to do especially if the diagnosis is fresh. Of course a majority of the time you will need to talk about it. But autism can often dominate your entire day and conversation. Even when the child goes to sleep parents read books and watch documentaries to try and learn more. It’s important to have a time and space that’s ASD-free where you can focus on unrelated challenges you face.

  1. Set aside couple time.

Finding the time and money to go on a date can be challenging. Even if there is room in the budget for night out, it’s hard to find a good babysitter who has experience with special needs children. But a night at home can be just as beneficial, even if it’s just lighting some candles, dancing in the living room, or watching something on Netflix.

  1. Have each other’s back.

Everyone reaches a boiling point at one time or another. And when your child is having a meltdown it’s important to be calm and level headed. Have your spouse take over while you take a break and settle your nerves.

  1. Be understanding.

One parent, out of necessity, is often more versed in autism than the other. Julie recalls that at times she noticed herself being bossy, nagging, or correcting her husband on how to handle their child. Don’t point fingers or blame one another. Remember to be mindful and share the information.

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By Raiza Belarmino